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A Lesson Learned
Jan 2, 07 By · 10 Comments










Ouch. I hate it when I do something with completely good intentions and it goes all awry.
Tammy I happened to read your post last night about this new family and requesting prayers. This morning I went to their site and saw the message that was posted and felt for you. I know you just did something out of the goodness of your heart, you were only asking for prayers for a little baby who could surely use the prayers – and you know the power of prayer from the ladies on that board. You couldn’t have known that the site was meant to be private and they weren’t ready for outsiders. You only shared with the utmost of good intentions. I wondered if the reason they weren’t ready for others to meet their daughter was because maybe they hadn’t shared the news of her diagnosis with everyone yet; so I went back and read through the history and they do mention that her blood test came back positive so that news was already out there. Don’t beat yourself up over this Tammy, you meant no harm. Hugs to you!
Tammy, I admire you for being willing and able to post an apology online. That is one of the hardest things for me to do: to apology to someone that I have offended. I hope this family will accept your apology and still allow you to be friends with them. I know you can help them in so many ways. You have helped me in the year that I have known you.
BTW, we are still up at the hospital, are you going up there anytime soon? Email me at mark.andersen@l-3com.com if you’ll be there. Maybe we can visit? We will be there wed, hopefully not thursday:).
I am sure that the family will see it differently once they get used to the thought of the whole DS thing. I would probably be upset too if I did not get to tell first, but I might have done the same thing as you did if someone came around now and had a DS baby. I am sure they will forgive you.
Your heart was in the right place! Don’t beat yourself up. Your sincerety with the apology is most appropriate and hopefully will be a bridge to regaining your friendship.
Don’t beat yourself up! Like everyone else had said your heart was in the right place and the family just needs time to understand the joy and beauty of their new child.
What a sweet heart you have. Your intentions were good and Godly and as Michelle stated they had already mentioned the tests were positive. I am sure you are already forgiven.
God Bless You!
I don’t think anyone will hold an honest mistake against you, Tammy. We all blow it from time to time.
I hope this family realizes, soon, that their child is as special as all children and it’s not necessary to keep his little something extra a secret.
I love how open you are about Parker’s struggles. And it never occurs to me that he has Down Syndrome. I find myself getting excited for him when he gains a pound or acts like he’s going to crawl across the floor. I guess it should occur to me but it really doesn’t. I just see him as your baby. Period.
My name is Nathan and I am the father of the family spoken of. A family member read this post and suggested that I read it as well. I want thank you for your apology, as I can tell it was truly sincere. Please know that no offense was taken. I know that none was meant.
After reading the other comments I would also like to clear up our reaction about our daughter’s website. I, not my wife, am the one who reacted poorly to the influx of visitors and take full responsibility for any offense that may have been taken. None was intended. We have always been open and accepting of the fact that our daughter has Down Syndrome. I am greatful that she is who she is, but I see her as my duaghter first and foremost. As our duaghter is still in the hospital, the website was created so that we could easily share the latest news of her condition and our feelings with family and friends without spending hours on the phone.
We appreciate all those who logged onto the website, but we were unprepared for the response. The number of visitors more doubled in the space of 12 hours. People that we did not know were blocked so that we could keep an open forum of our thoughts and feelings, as well as our daughter’s progress. I apologize to any who may have been offended.
Tammy – I know you meant only to help this family – and while I didn’t log on to see and pray for this sweet little girl – I will keep her in my thoughts and prayers. Anyone who knows you knows you were only thinking to help her
As the mom of the two year old boy – not two any longer wahhhh – I can definitely say that! I hope that Parker is doing better today – you are in our thoughts and prayers!!!